I flew across the country to meet this little girl.
Why did they adopt? Besides obviously wanting a little girl? {My friend jokes her husband can’t make girl spermies}. She will tell you straight out: God told me we needed to adopt.
Well amen.
I flew across the country to meet this little girl.
Why did they adopt? Besides obviously wanting a little girl? {My friend jokes her husband can’t make girl spermies}. She will tell you straight out: God told me we needed to adopt.
Well amen.
It was a long time ago. My oldest was 2. I had only been a SAHM for 6 months, quite the failure wasn’t I? It wasn’t a hot day and I had just handed her a sippy cup full of juice.
I realized the second I closed the door that it was locked…AND that my keys were right there ON THE SEAT, right in plain sight. Okay. WAAAAY before cell phones. I seriously began to loose it. My kid? Hardly noticed anything was amiss. She was happy all buckled up nice and TIGHT, no way she could get out on her own…that’s the point with those seats, right? I was in the library parking lot, and my dilemma began. I needed to go make a phone call, but sheesh, I would have to leave her there, alone. With out me!
I finally decided to run inside. (oh please don’t let any scary people break into my car, with the keys in plain site, with my KID inside…)
I called the police. They said they were on their way. The library ladies were sympathetic, but not about to run out and help me. I went back out and waited maybe 5 minutes. By now my kid had finished her juice and could tell something was not right? Why do you keep looking at me from OUTside the car mommy? Just get in already, mommy?
I ran back inside. This time to call my husband. He was 20 minutes away, but had the extra set of keys with him. He left immediately. I called the police back. They said, we’re on the way. (What? Stop at Dunkin Donuts along the way?)
And nearly 20 minutes of my life drained away while stressing and waiting for them to get there. My baby was VERY upset by then, talk about helpless mommy syndrome.
The police made it first, and had the car open in exactly 5 seconds.
My husband pulled in about 3 minutes later. What a mess I was. My little girl got over it all pretty quick. (Hey Dad’s here! What a treat!)
I honestly thought the police were going to take me down to the station in cuffs. I would have entered a Guilty Plea of Horrible Mommy, Throw Away the Key.
It passed, we all recovered. And I haven’t repeated my car child abuse episode since. (oh gosh, knock on wood!) And I now realize that pretty much everyone has either done this exact thing…or something like it.
It turns out that it was my neighbor’s turn yesterday. In her case, her wireless key fob stopped working. It would lock the vehicle (with baby in it) but wouldn’t UNlock it. She borrowed a cell phone and called a locksmith (at the suggestion of the cell phone Good Samaritan). She called 1-888-POP-OPEN. Pop-A-Lock . In less than 10 minutes they were there and opened her vehicle for FREE! The nice man said it was a ‘community service’ they provide. Wow, a big thank you from all of us moms!
It’s not that she didn’t stress and all… but let’s just compare those 20 minutes of my life to the dissimilar 10 minutes of hers? I lost at least 5 years of my life due to my freaking out. I choose life today WITH cell phones.
I keep hearing that the police will not help you unlock your car, I don’t know if that’s true or not (they were slow—but they helped me?) But now you know. If you lock your kid in the car; your friendly Pop-A-Lock dudes will help you for free. You’ll still be a horrible mommy, but it’s a well frequented club.
Please, everyone be careful when the temperatures get high, forgetting your keys is one thing, forgetting your kid is another.
I have this amazing friend. She’s like a mythical creature. The kind of person who can see through you. Do you know someone who always has something kind to say about you before you can get out a decent greeting? She is that kind of person.
I once was with her and we were walking into the YMCA together. At the front desk was this grumpy old man. On this day he was particularly cranky. The kind of ornery where you avert your eyes and pray that he doesn’t see you kind of ornery. I did exactly that. But not Deana. Oh, noooo. She practically assaulted the man attempting to reach over the counter and through the partition in order to give him a hug?! A Hug? I was afraid he might then hurt her. Instead…he began crying. Weeping. She could tell (with her x-ray mind powers) that he was very upset, sad kind of upset, not just the usual grumpy old man. (Which is of course all I saw). He breaks down and begins a very long story about how his wife was very ill, and had died 3 months ago to the day. Yup, I’m the complete cow at this point. Plus, now I’m feeling all weird cuz I don’t know what to do or say? I can’t bring myself to hoist on up over the partition for a hug like she did. I manage instead to slither away off to the emotional safety of the locker room, where no one talks to you no matter how upset or ornery.
(Well, except for Deana, she talks to anyone, naked or not).
I usually describe her as my cheeky British friend, and I do love her accent. She says things like ‘Oooh that would be lovely’, when you’ve just asked her out to lunch. And she describes food as ‘gorgeous’. And tea…well, that’s a given. We would have tea sampling nights at her house, but I only came for the ‘Digestives’.
(I never failed to point out to her that in America it’s funny to eat food named after the digestive tract).
But the most amazing thing about this fabulous friend of mine is that when I first met her, she and her husband had already adopted two children. And she made it clear to anyone she met that they were looking to adopt more, ‘God-willing’. (‘They don’t seem to be coming through me, but I know they are out there’, is how she would express it.) Their first child was adopted through the foster care system in Arizona, and the other child she ‘found’ through a friend who had a sister that was only 23 and on her 5th(!) child. This woman had nearly given up her 4th child and Deana was able to work with her and make an agreement about a very open adoption of this 5th child. Long story short. Deana was in the delivery room, was the first to hold the baby, and within about 2 months (and lots of hormones) was nursing (yes NURSING) that baby!
Fast forward a few years of her life, and two more adopted children (another through foster care, and another through her church’s adoption program) these last two under a year apart in age, she now had 4 children under the age of 5! Whoa. And since life likes to throw dirt clods at you, within 2 months of adopting the 4th child, my friend was pregnant herself. That would make 5 children under the age of 6. Oh my.
Oh did I mention her husband was finishing up med. school at this point? Yes, MEDICAL SCHOOL, as in never see my husband kind of school. (Believe me, law school ain’t got nuthin’ on life in med. school). And what comes after med. school? That’s right. A surgery residency. Think Grey’s Anatomy, without all the sex in the supply closet, with 5(!) children. If she and the kids didn’t see him during med. school, then he doesn’t EXIST during the residency.
Remember what I said about my friend being a mythical creature? I wasn’t kidding. She is the onlyest person I’ve ever met, who could possibly pull off what she does on a daily basis. She saves stray cats; she has the heart of a giant, and apparently doesn’t need any real amount of sleep to function! I just got off the phone with her Sunday night, and she told me she can ‘feel’ 2 more children (at least!) out there. Now that is an amazing giant, and a very real person.
Deana with her 4 oldest children. I think she is about a month pregnant here.
What is my point? My friend Deana doesn’t have enough on her plate. She is compiling a book (a book?—I’m exhausted just typing her legend!) of adoption and foster care stories. Besides her own fairy-tale story, she has assembled over 20 other adoption and/or foster tales. And she would like to gather at least 50.
I am asking you if you have one (or to ask your friends) if you/they would be willing to share their adoption story with her. You can use my contact info (above left on my blog), and I will forward it on to Deana.
Here is the letter she has written:
Dearest friends
I’m writing to you at this time to ask for your help in writing and compiling a book on inspirational adoption stories.
As most of you know I have had some amazing experiences myself. I am sharing my thoughts and feelings and the joys these children have brought. I would like this book to be a bridge for those who feel hopelessness, sadness, anger and confusion to take the leap of faith towards adoption, so they can have the family they dream of. I hope this book will make a difference in many peoples’ lives through all of these amazing heartfelt stories.
I am also writing this for all of the children in the world today who long for parents to hold them, read to them and tuck them into bed and hear the words, “I love you!” These are God’s children just waiting to belong to a loving family.
These stories will clearly show God’s love for all of us and how His hand guides us. I am asking if you know anyone who has adopted, are birth parents or who grew up as an adoptive child. Inviting them to share their story would make such a difference.
These stories will be a comfort to others to safely walk into the unknown joys of adoption.
For those of you who are adoptive parents and know exactly what I am talking about, just pause for a moment and think back to how you felt and the miracles that followed. I know everyone is busy and time is precious. Please try to carve out a little time for this.
When this book is published a portion of the proceeds will go to a non-profit organization benefiting children in need.
I believe in my heart that God knows his children and He wants to bless us. It takes great faith to trust in His ways and not ours. May God bless you and inspire you to share.
Thank you,
Deana Coreen